In the interest of Stress Awareness Month (April), I de-stressed and paused blogging in consideration of my mental health. And since May is Mental Health Awareness Month, it’s time to ponder remaining positive despite facing multiple challenges. There are defenses against distress one can implement to facilitate thinking positively.

Change is an accepted part of life. Some change is good, and we love it, look forward to it (e.g., new house, job promotion). The process involved in making that good change happen was likely a source of joy. On the flip side, some of life’s changes are distressing (e.g., loss of a loved one, divorce). Some change (good or bad) occurs without warning, so we’re usually unprepared for it.

Whoa. You Didn’t See That Coming …

Unexpected change can be disorienting, producing a physical response of feeling… nothing. But a proactive response is within your control. It may sound contradictory, but you can prepare for unplanned changes. It’s a mental thing, a psychological preparation.

Facing unplanned change with a prepared mind creates a sense of reorientation even with those things seemingly beyond our control. Change is inevitable. Okay. So, mentally preparing for it makes sense. Even if you don’t know the “when,” you can prepare for an “if,” finding it possible to be both proactive and reactive when the unexpected happens. Mental preparation also allows contemplation of possible responses when faced with stress surrounding change.

Some might say preparing for change is tempting fate. But consider emergency responders. In very real-life situations, these people work in occupations centered on dealing with sudden emergencies; they must be “at the ready” constantly. As such, in training, they learn to anticipate all possible scenarios and how to address them proactively. They learn how to prevent certain situations or minimize any harm—and what effective actions to take should these events occur. Adopting some of how they prepare for extraordinary change can impart valuable insight into how we can address the stresses of life’s ordinary disruptions. There are a few ways to do that.

The Probability Question

A correlation exists between the degree one should anticipate/prepare for something happening and its degree of risk of occurrence. For example, people living in high-flood risk areas prepare for its inevitably: stabilizing and securing their property, being ready for it mentally.

Remember, the initial focus is preparing mentally for potential upheaval (and any resulting stress). Parents-to-be have probably done a fair amount of babysitting. But while they can prepare for the birth (get the nursery together, etc.), they have no true idea about the life changes parenthood will bring (oh, boy). But that’s okay. Before that bundle-of-joy arrives, they prepare by reading up, getting advice and pointers from family and close friends who’ve already joined the club. Soon-to-be parents also identify areas of concern they believe they’ll face in their new parenting role.

Lastly, practice makes perfect sense when getting mentally prepared for stressful change. Dealing with the small stuff semi-serves as a dry run because it’s opportunity for learning and managing stressful situations on a smaller scale—to later apply to the major occurrences. It’s invaluable “in-the-moment” training.

By no means do I have it all together. But I’ve adopted a few tried-and-trues that help make my life more fun, more manageable. Effectively addressing the many minor daily challenges and changes we face helps us develop the skills necessary when navigating the unexpected major ones. It boils down to living and learning—and applying what you’ve learned.

So, go ahead: sweat the small stuff (occasionally). It’ll do you good.

The central character in my fiction series, psychiatrist Dr. Naomi Alexander, has her own take on defending against distress. Right here.

Until next time, stay serif.